Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch

The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch is a fictional weapon from the film Monty Python and the Holy Grail. It bears a striking resemblance to the Sovereign's Orb of the United Kingdom, and seems to draw some inspiration from the Holy Spear of Antioch. It also made a brief appearance in the 1977 film Jabberwocky where it was being held by King Bruno the Questionable (the latter film was directed by Terry Gilliam, starred Michael Palin, and featured a cameo by Terry Jones, all members of Monty Python).

Contents

Description

The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch is a visual satire of a type of royal regalia known as a globus cruciger, specifically the Sovereign's Orb of the United Kingdom. The Sovereign's Orb similarly has a band of jewels running along the centre, and a half-band on the top hemisphere, with a cruciform at the crest.

The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch is a reference to the mythical Holy Spear of Antioch. The supposed Holy Spear was unearthed from the floor of a Church during the Siege of Antioch (1098) by crusaders on the First Crusade, found by a poor and otherwise unknown monk named Peter Bartholomew. Its "discovery", during the darkest hours of the siege when all hope seemed lost, quickly became a source of contention between those crusaders who believed Bartholomew, and the more sceptical who did not; yet in the end its "discovery" was credited by the crusaders in inspiring them to overcome seemingly impossible odds in breaking through the siege to continue on their quest to Jerusalem.

Usage instructions

In Monty Python and the Holy Grail, the Holy Hand Grenade is described a "sacred relic" carried by Cistercian monk Brother Maynard (Eric Idle) and is used near the film's conclusion to destroy a killer rabbit that blocks the path of King Arthur and his hapless Knights Errant. Although unusually ornate in design, the Holy Hand Grenade functions like any other hand grenade.

Particularly important is the part of counting to three after the pulling of the triggering pin (the surmounted cross), complicated by King Arthur's mental block on counting. The instructions for its use can be found in the fictitious Book of Armaments, Chapter 2, verses 9-21, parodying the King James Bible and the Athanasian Creed

...And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O LORD, bless this Thy hand grenade that with it Thou mayest blow Thine enemies to tiny bits, in Thy mercy." And the LORD did grin and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats and large chu... [At this point, the friar is urged by Brother Maynard to "skip a bit, brother"]... And the LORD spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin, then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it."[1]

Arthur then holds up the Holy Hand Grenade and cries out "ONE! TWO! FIVE!" Sir Galahad corrects him, shouting "Three, sir!".[1] Arthur then yells "THREE!" and hurls the grenade at the killer rabbit. The Grenade soars through the air, accompanied by a short bit of choral music, then bounces once and explodes. The killer rabbit dies in the explosion, and the Knights subsequently enter the cave that it had been guarding. This makes a loud echo that the police who were investigating the dead historian's body hear, causing them to run towards the explosion.

Replicas

Toy Vault sells a mini plush replica of the Holy Hand Grenade. It is a golden plush ball with a cross on top and a label reading "Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch". The 5" replica is "sized to be easily thrown with only one hand".

On 19 March 2009, several buildings in Shoreditch, East London, were evacuated after water company workers discovered a replica of the Holy Hand Grenade under a fire hydrant cover.[2] The workers reported the suspicious object but the bomb squad determined there was no danger and after about 45 minutes they declared the area to be safe.[2]

Cultural references

Most editions of the Worms video game series contain a weapon called Holy Hand Grenade. Visually, it resembles the one in the film, and has a three-second timer that can't be changed. The open-source video game Hedgewars, spoofs this reference with the "Hellish Hand Grenade".

Several Holy Hand Grenades are available in Duke Nukem: Time to Kill in the medieval levels.

The post-apocalyptic role-playing video game Fallout 2 and its sequel Fallout: New Vegas also feature a throwing weapon called the Holy Frag Grenade, bearing the same shape as the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. In the sequel the number five is crossed out and replaced by the number three, referring to the repeated joke about Arthur's miscounting.

Holy Hand Grenades are found in some versions of the original Bard's Tale role playing games.

The Black Templars in Warhammer 40,000 have an item called the Holy Orb of Antioch, which is a very powerful hand grenade carried by Black Templar commanders. Interestingly, there is no limit on the number of Holy Orbs you may include in an army.

In Sonny 2, there is a monster called the killer rabbit which will occasionally use an attack that produces the "holy hand grenade" effect.

In AdventureQuest Worlds, the Holy Hand Grenade may be purchased from the Good Reputation Shop once your good reputation has reached level 10.

In the video game Postal 2 if you enter the church in the siege a priest is throwing holy hand grenades behind a table

In the 1980s PC game Moraff's World, the Holy Hand Grenade is a usable item that can be found in the dungeon stages.

In the television show Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Spike refers to a scythe as the Holy Hand Grenade

In Dan Neils 22 May 2010 review of the Aston Martin Rapide in the Wall Street Journal "The Aston's stitched leather interior is simply magnificent, like they rolled the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch into a stockyard."

For Team Fortress 2, players who bought Worms: Reloaded before 2 September 2010 were rewarded with a custom in-game skin (hat) for the Soldier featuring Holy Hand Grenades on his chest instead of normal grenades. When the Soldier has the hat equipped and taunts with the Equalizer (a mining pick), a Hallelujah chorus sounds while he pulls a grenade off his chest and blows himself up.[3]

In Mafia Wars, there is a weapon called a Holy Hand Grenade. It is gained by completing jobs in the Città del Vaticano (Vatican City) level of the game.

References

  1. ^ a b John Cleese, Graham Chapman, Terry Gilliam, Eric Idle, Terry Jones and Michael Palin, Monty Python and the Holy Grail: The Screenplay, page 76, Methuen, 2003 (U.K.) ISBN 0-413-77394-9
  2. ^ a b Bassett, Tony (19 March 2009). "Pub is closed by Monty Python grenade". Evening Standard. http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/standard/article-23664399-details/article.do?ito=newsnow&. 
  3. ^ "The healing is not as rewarding as the hurting!". Valve. 24 August 2010. http://teamfortress.com/post.php?id=4245&p=1. Retrieved 27 August 2010. 

External links